A History of Me
I was a bit of a hellion when I was young. I ran around with the wrong crowd. Okay, I was the wrong crowd if you asked many of my friends’ parents. We were typical male teens, drinking, fighting and getting into trouble.
At about 18 or 19, I started studying Isshin-Ryu karate, an Okinawan martial art. The sensei was a good one who, while making us do traditional katas and such, also focused on practicality and functionality for street fights and realistic situations.
The most important lesson I learned from him still sticks with me today.
“Put your hand in front of your mouth. Say hell. Say shit. Say damn. What did you feel?”
Most people said, “Nothing.”
“No,” He said. “You felt something. What was it?”
“Air.”
“Exactly. Words are nothing but air. Air can’t hurt you. There’s no reason to fight over something someone calls you when it is nothing but air.”
It was a valuable lesson that kept me from getting into fights I ordinarily would have gotten into. I stuck with him off-and-on for a couple of years, enjoying the classes immensely until I could no longer afford them and became too busy with schoolwork anyway.
Throughout college, undergrad and my masters program, I remained pretty active. I played roller hockey, skate a lot, ran some and did some weight training. I was very lean (skinny, even). I went into college 6’3″ and weighing 150 pounds. I finished my lengthy college career at a whopping 165.
My mama always told me I was too skinny. A job took my wife and me to South Florida where I continued to eat like it was my last meal, but didn’t continue to exercise. A few years later, I had gone from a 30 to a 32 inch waist… then we moved to Atlanta where age, stress and poor diet started catching up to me. I thought I was finally filling out when I got to a 35″ waist and weighed 237. That’s when my mama saw me and said, “You know, your face is getting really round… and I don’t mean that in a good way.”
I thought, Oh, my God. Did my fat mama just tell me I’m getting fat?!
I dropped about 30 pounds in a couple months just by cutting most sugar from my diet and starting to walk. It probably also helped that I stopped going to Mellow Mushroom and eating a whole pizza for lunch every day.
Fast Forward to 2012
Another work move had brought us back to Alabama. I was up around 210 and not terribly happy with myself. My wife and I were watching a show and a guy took off his shirt, showing his ripped abs. I said, “I used to have abs like that.” My wife looked over and–in that voice only wives and mothers have–asked, “When did you ever have abs like that?” I told her all the way up until I was about 24 or 25. To which she said, “Oh. Before me.”
So, I decided I wanted to get my six-pack back so I could take a picture, hand it to her and then not worry about getting fat again.
I joined the gym at 210 pounds and 22% body fat. I started running again–something I enjoyed in high school. I lifted daily and began eating more and more healthily. Within a year, I think I was down to about 10% body fat and 180. Then I dropped to 172 and 7.5% body fat. At that time, I had to eat 4,500 to 6,500 calories every day to keep from dropping below 172.
If you haven’t used it, My Fitness Pal is an awesome tool I recommend to everyone. It helps you make wise choices. For example, I know I burn 150 calories running a 7:30 mile. I would look at a Snickers and say, “225 calories. That means I have to run 10 minutes to work off something that will take me 30-60 seconds to eat. Pass.”
The next years:
In the past 9 years, I have continued going to the gym and maintaining a relatively healthy diet. I ruptured 3 discs in my lower back in 2012 and suffered with that (having several epidurals) over the course of a few years before finally having a discectomy on one. I’ve also had to have surgery on both shoulders (left for scar tissue from a torn rotator cuff and a bone spur on the acromion) and the right twice for a similar bone spur and then scraping of scar tissue.
2019
In 2019, my best friend of over 30 years died. I was already going through depression and this made things worse. He was the closest person to me following my older sister. It was a tough loss. His widow felt alone and she decided she needed to take a self-defense class. She found a school that does Krav Maga and BJJ. I joined with her because I knew he wanted me to take care of her and help her. She dropped out after a few months and became reclusive. I continued for a while longer, but then came down with an illness (probably covid, though they never tested me) on December 25, 2019. I couldn’t breathe and kept telling the doctors I felt like I had pneumonia again (which I had had in 2017 I think). This lasted until the middle of March. By then, Covid had shut everything down in Alabama.
When the gym closed in March or April of 2020, I was 200 pounds and 8.5% body fat. I was working on leaning out again after trying to bulk up some. To be totally honest, it has been hard getting back in the swing since then. I’m now hovering around 192-195 and 10.5% body fat.
Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu
Ever since watching the first UFC fights on pay-per-view in college, I have wanted to learn BJJ. Because of my back and shoulder problems, I have avoided it for a long time. With my best friend dying (and us finding his widow dead in August 2020 of natural causes), I decided to give myself a birthday present and join a real BJJ school.
A few months ago, I signed up at 10th Planet in Decatur, Alabama. It and Triad are known to be the two best BJJ schools in north Alabama. Since moving back to Alabama in 2006, I had heard about the instructor, Brandon McCaghren. He was friends with a co-worker and had trained him. I’m not sure if he actually had a 10th Planet studio then, but knowing his name and proximity made my choice easy.
I won’t lie. Some things aren’t easy with my back and shoulders. But I will tell you, Brandon is an amazing instructor. I couldn’t have asked for someone better.
Starting Point
I am usually a very private person, but share all this history about me so you can see where and how I am starting. Yes, I recently turned 53. Yes, I am in somewhat decent shape. No, I am not special in any way. I decided to undertake this project, maintaining this blog, not only for myself, but for those who–like me–have wanted to do something for a long time, perhaps even BJJ, but felt too old to begin a new adventure.
This is my adventure. I hope you’ll ride it out with me as you start your own adventures into something that has both intrigued and scared you.
